Wednesday, 4 July 2007

Crimes Against Craft

Firstly I would like to talk about these strange concrete creatures that were found in our back yard upon moving in to our current abode. They are as you can see rather hideous, but I have solved the mystery of where they came from thanks to Tanya the Art Butcher, there is some sort of vortex between our backyard and Happy Hollow. It's the only explanation that makes any sense.

Now, on to legwarmers, these are actually very cute on the kids:

Somehow they just don't have the same effect on adults. Now I know how to wear those skinny jeans of mine.

As long as we are talking adults in childrens clothing, check out this clown (and I'm not talking about the picture on her jumper.)
According to the blurb on the book this design is from there are some timeless classics contained in it's pages. Take a geezer at these, timeless classics?!

At least that last one has an inbuilt head rest, beautiful AND practical.

Has anyone noticed the eighties are back? In the fashion world at least. Remember those black elastic belts? High waists? Bubble skirts? Skinny jeans? (I know I know.)
Here is a little picture that shows the dangers of tight high pants, proceed with caution, the following picture contains material that may offend sensitive viewers.
It's a camel toe. The picture is not very clear, be thankful.



Blogger meggie said...

O Crafty! I practically screamed with laughter. Each one a gem of crime.

4 July 2007 at 13:07  
Blogger Fairlie said...

Maybe it's something to do with legwarmers having their origins as dance attire...but it seems from your photos that it is compulsory to assume a "jazz hands" pose when you're wearing them! I had a stunning pair back around 1982 which were maroon with a gold lurex thread through them. Noice.

(Haven't commented for a while - the computer I was using in Sydney wouldn't let me on your blog...?)

4 July 2007 at 14:36  
Anonymous kirsty said...

Oooh, nasty. The last thing I need in my wardrobe is something to make my legs look FATTER. That jumper with built-in nap pillow could be handy for travel, though...

4 July 2007 at 14:59  
Blogger Sussanah said...

My husband calls the camel toed woman drug smugglers, why, oh why you ask??? Well because there is 30 pounds of crack down there.
(you're a little sorry you asked now arent' you, but bet you laughed)

4 July 2007 at 17:07  
Blogger Aunty Evil said...

Oh good God!

Can't you put the warning at the TOP of your blog? Seriously, those sensitive souls like me get deeply offended at that colourful minx draping herself over the neighbour's car. Is that you?

And what's with the hanky on her head? They have no shame, these people.

4 July 2007 at 17:20  
Anonymous Uli said...

I'm am particularly fond of the one with the bat wings and head rest.

4 July 2007 at 17:34  
Blogger Stomper Girl said...

I don't know what's wrong with the rest of you. Those stripey leg warmers are GORGEOUS, I tells ya. Gorgeous.

4 July 2007 at 18:14  
Blogger h&b said...

The 'timeless classics' are indeed dateable ;)

Reminds me of when my whole art class went to Canberra to see the Jenny Kee/ Linda Jackson exhibition ....

4 July 2007 at 21:03  
Blogger GirlyGirl said...

Maybe I won't knit legwarmers after all....... Tight jeans aren't an option for me thank god!

Keep the crimes coming.....

4 July 2007 at 23:22  
Blogger Aunty Evil said...

As seems to be the way these days, when you appear to be feeding my obsessions, I am back again.

I just spotted and analysed the picture (2nd last one) of the "family".

Ye gods! The woman looks mighty proud of herself. She's made her family look like a bunch of imbeciles. The man looks like he is wondering what he ever saw in her, to put them through this, and wondering if he can take the kids and rescue them from the ongoing torture. The son, well, i think it's too late for him, I think he is already wearing a skirt.

The daughter is wearing Stomper's knitted hat. For more reasons why the husband should leave, you should see Stomper's post and comments. :)

5 July 2007 at 08:24  
Blogger crafty said...

Susannah, yes, and yes.
h&b, they are actually Jenny Kee designs. The girl is wearing a matching skirt, I had another funny photo of the family but I accidentally deleted it.
My personal favorite is hanky head.
Stomper it's OK because you -are- a dancer. As long as you don't go 'round in legwarmers, sheer stockings and a jumper not quite long enough so you have to keep pulling it down.
Aunty Evil, your comments make me laugh harder than my own jokes do.
Fairlie, it seems my blog is a moody little bitch, she wouldn't even let me look at her for a while.
Thankyou everyone else, and welcome to the blogosphere GirlyGirl.

5 July 2007 at 08:50  
Blogger Tanya Brown said...

Will you think less of me if I tell you that I like your garden statues?

As for the rest - dear god! - between the photos, your comments and Aunty Evil's, I seem to have gotten cinnamon tea up in my sinuses.

Camel toes - oh, I have a horrible junior high school memory. It was the late seventies, and stepmother sewed me a jumpsuit, one of those all-in-one vest and pant outfits. I must have grown five inches between when she started and she finished, but I had to wear the #$% thing to school anyhow. And, well, some part of my anatomy had to give. Enough said!

7 July 2007 at 14:10  
Blogger Sherrin said...

Have been trawling back through your archives... someone (?) told me about your 'crimes against craft' ... hilarious!! You should start up again... maybe get a little weekly meme going? I'd play along. :o)

22 August 2009 at 21:54  

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